Anger

Anger can be one of the strongest emotions that you can feel.  It really has so many arms that make it up into the one component called 'anger'.  Those arms include passion, pain, impatience and many more.

Recently I've been suffering with really bad patches of anger.  It has truly been one of the most difficult periods in my life and I thought I'd share my experience of it with you today. 

I work approximately an hour away from my hometown, which means that I drive about 2 hours per day without any bad traffic jams or accidents.  This has really been one of the major things that has upped my levels of anger.  On a daily basis I encounter absolutely horrendous driving, bullying and irrational decision-making.  This makes me angry for many reasons, however the main reason being the fact that these people put so many people's lives in danger.  It really is tragic and makes me angry.

However, I really have been feeling like I have a constant black cloud hovering over my head.  My initial anger has lead to other things making me angry and eventually I, myself become slightly irrational. 

I've just become more and more aware of a slight depression creeping in due to this 'black cloud'.  My depression isn't the normal type where you can't get out of bed or even feel like killing yourself.  Nothing like that at all.  No, it includes feelings of doubt and deep sadness at my state of affairs.  It really affects my home life and also constantly keeps my mindset in a negative spin.  I've also noticed that I've just disliked everyone, even my friends.  But it hasn't got anything to do with 'falling out' with them - just stupid anger at nothing!

However, recently I've had a good long chat about things with my husband.  It took SUCH a load off just verbally discussing things with him and pin-pointing the possible roots of my anger.

I've decided that I will no longer let anger win.  I'll make sure that I have a happy positive mood every single day.  This is going to be my biggest challenge EVER and I'm going to have to work very hard on it.  But I'm totally committed to changing these feelings. 

I've decided along with my husband that if I'm driving, that I'll imagine myself in a bubble.  As long as nobody else enters my bubble, I will remain calm and considerate.  However, I have rights to fight (not literally haha) if they enter my bubble.

This is my road to recovery and I've got a long way to go.  It will probably take every conserted effort to ensure I remain happy every day - but I'm willing to undertake the journey.

I'm not sure if anybody else is going through a similar situation or perhaps even something different but that it is affecting you in the same ways.  But I can ensure you that if you ever sent me an email or comment that I'll be here to support and help you.

We need to be positive and happy because it really has many affects on our friendships, relationships, health and mind set.

Here is to a new happy chapter!
Angie x